Keyboards/Guitars/Vocals
(The track playing is BERNT at his BEST!)
NOTE: The technique demonstrated on this track has become known as 'Bernt's Method'. PLEASE... don't try this at home, it is dangerous having things thrown at you.

Bernt had absolutely nothing to do with SHY at the CHEMIST, andmuch to Torchie's annoyance, he's a great guitarist, & plays keyboards like a concert pissartist pianist.

Legend has it that Bernt, and his Svent, spent most of their formative musical years as Dutch Morris Dancers, and after an embarrassing moment with a piece of knotted string outside a packed pub one Bank Holiday in Eastbourne, he gave up to look for a band as cover.



His first attempt found him in a cabaret-style band doing theusual covers..
Those of you with good graphics cards may just see the remaining stain on his cabaret trousers.


He is well known for an astounding andresilient smile on stage and off. Some say he was blessed by the fairies when he was born, tho' some also say he probably gets too close to Dave the Lighter while he's performing

One day while roofing he met Torchie who was looking out for a roofer. When he roofed Torchie's roof and got talking on the roof with Torchie, (mainly about roofs) they decided to get down from the roof, and go to the pub.

On the pub roof a dynamic link was forged, which Torchie subsequently used to hold up his roof.
Ten years later, they both discovered a passion for upsetting the innocent gig-going public, and he joined SAD

Bernt spent some time in Hospital recently after his nose caught in his keyboard during a SAD gig. It finally dropped off completely, and he now carrys it with him on a chain.

Bernt has also spent some time at Muddled & Skunky's giving evidence in the 'Case of the Missing Keys', and is rumoured to be so stressed by the affair that he may have given up on his daytime Morris Dancing lessons, to spend more time in the pub.

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Previous Bands: Morris & Morris, Whispering Morris, Morris Minor, Morris Less Speed, Bernt & Spent

Likes: Tapping hairy ankles with a big stick, cavorting on stage, eating wine. His island retreat.

Hobbies: Musical chairs, Musical Morris', Stick Carving & Waving, Bell Ringing, Fishing, particularly barehanded in pipes...